If there’s one thing that makes this particular venue stand apart from all the others like it, it’s that I have always pushed the idea that food should be fun. Honestly, what’s the point in slaving over a hot stove in a hot kitchen if you aren’t having any fun doing it?  Just once this week, this month or this year, walk into the kitchen and make something that’s just FUN!  It doesn’t have to be good for you, it doesn’t have to be worthy of a setting on the table of a fine dining restaurant, but it should make you smile. That’s what this particular “recipe” is all about.

At moments like these inspiration can, and should, come from anything that puts a smile on your face.  In my case, it was a few minutes wasted on YouTube watching the iconic antics of John Cleese,  Graham Chapman and the rest of the cast of Monty Python’s Flying Circus.  In particular, the SPAM skit:

In the end, I settled on using SPAM Egg Sausage and SPAM, because it’s “…Not got much SPAM in it.” (Certainly not as much SPAM as SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM eggs and SPAM.)  Initially I was going to simply serve it up as a breakfast plate, but I had a strong desire for some good rye bread, so the Full Monty Python Sandwich became the result of the evening.

Not healthy.  Not terribly gourmet. possibly enough to make my cardiologist have a few nightmares, but it was fun to make, fun to eat and just the thought of it still has me smiling.

Go ahead.  Have some fun in the kitchen. Even if the results are awful, you’ll be laughing about it and that’s what the entire adventure is about.

Read more…

Popularity: 2% [?]

Not everyone loves Gordon Ramsay but his image definitely precedes him. So much so that even kids have gotten in on the act. I found this video early this morning and thought it might help to give someone else a chuckle. It did me.

Popularity: 1% [?]

This is a true story sent to my wife.  It was so hilarious I just had to pass it along!

*PREGNANT TURKEY STORY *

One year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister’s
house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my
sister is, my mom decided to play a trick.

She told my sister that she needed something from the
store. When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of
the oven. She removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen,
inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey.

She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven.

When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey
out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing.

When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and
pulled out the little bird. With a look of total shock on
her face, my mother exclaimed,

‘Patricia,
You’ve cooked a pregnant bird!’

At the reality of this horrifying news, my sister started
to cry. It took the family two hours to convince her that
turkeys lay eggs!

Popularity: 1% [?]

This from the equal rights and opportunities department at CbsoP.com. Because we care about all of our readers, even those who may no longer be among the living, just as long as their rotting fingers can click on an ad, that is. Or in case of some strange post apocalyptic catastrophe that should render any of my currently living readers among the legions of the walking dead, we still want to make sure that you’re eating as you should and in that bent, I present you with:

The Zombie Food Pyramid

So please, be sure to keep nutrition in mind over the Holiday season. I’d hate to see any stomach problems. (Assuming you still have one, that is.)

This image is from The Zombie Survival & Defense Wiki. If you thought it was chuckle worthy, please visit their site nd give them some love!

Popularity: 1% [?]

Bread Is Dangerous

1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread users.
2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.
3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever, and influenza ravaged whole nations
4. More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.
5. Bread is made from a substance called “dough.” It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse. The average North American eats more bread than that in one month!
6. Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit a low incidence of cancer, Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s disease, and osteoporosis.
7. Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread after as little as two days.
8. Bread is often a “gateway” food item, leading the user to “harder” items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter, and even cold cuts.
9. Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the human body is more than 90 percent water, it follows that eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by this absorptive food product, turning you into a soggy, gooey bread-pudding person.
10. Newborn babies can choke on bread.
11. Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 240 degrees Celsius! That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.
12. Most bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.

In light of these frightening statistics, we propose the following bread restrictions:

1. No sale of bread to minors
2. A nationwide “Just Say No To Toast” campaign, complete celebrity TV spots and bumper stickers.
3. A 300 percent federal tax on all bread to pay for all the societal ills we might associate with bread.
4. No animal or human images, nor any primary colors (which may appeal to children) may be used to promote bread usage.
5. The establishment of “Bread-free” zones around schools.

Reprinted from Physics 1021

Popularity: 1% [?]

I’ve been planning on unleashing some serious ranting on at least a few topics, but the week has been hectic at best.  In the interim, I have a wonderful suggestion for any of you who would like to know the finer points of food snobbery. The Food Snob’s Dictionary: An Essential Lexicon of Gastronomical Knowledge isjust the tool you need to help jump start your career as a  food snob.  It’s packed with all those tiny tidbits of knowledge that you’ll need to truly impress and bore the company you keep at dinner parties and buffets.

You really shouldn’t pass up this opportunity to help me out with my Christmas Spending get your hands on a tome of knowledge like this one. It is truly a lexicon of utterly useless and completely boorish useful and interesting information that your friends will want to rip your tongue out and serve it with fava beans love you for sharing with them. You’ll definitely be the one everybody is talking about!

The official Amazon Description:

Product Description
Food Snob n: reference term for the sort of food obsessive for whom the actual joy of eating and cooking is but a side dish to the accumulation of arcane knowledge about these subjects

From the author of The United States of Arugula–and coauthor of The Film Snob’s Dictionary and The Rock Snob’s Dictionary–a delectable compendium of food facts, terminology, and famous names that gives ordinary folk the wherewithal to take down the Food Snobs–or join their zealous ranks.

Open a menu and there they are, those confusing references to “grass-fed” beef, “farmstead” blue cheese, and “dry-farmed” fruits. It doesn’t help that your dinner companions have moved on to such heady topics as the future of the organic movement, or the seminal culinary contributions of Elizabeth Drew and Fernand Point. David Kamp, who demystified the worlds of rock and film for grateful readers, explains it all and more, in The Food Snobs Dictionary.

Both entertaining and authentically informative, The Food Snob’s Dictionary travels through the alphabet explaining the buzz-terms that fuel the food-obsessed, from “Affinage” to “Zest,” with stops along the way for “Cardoons,” “Fennel Pollen,” and “Sous-Vide,” all served up with a huge and welcome dollop of wit.

About the Author

DAVID KAMP is a writer and editor for Vanity Fair and GQ, and the author of The United States of Arugula, The Film Snob’s Dictionary, and The Rock Snob’s Dictionary. He lives in New York City. MARION ROSENFELD, a writer and producer, has spent her entire career in media, much of it food related. She lives in New York City. ROSS MacDONALD’s illustrations have appeared in many magazines, from The New Yorker to The Wall Street Journal. He illustrated The Film Snob’s Dictionary and The Rock Snob’s Dictionary.

So rush out and grab yourself a copy of The Food Snob’s Dictionary: An Essential Lexicon of Gastronomical Knowledge, you’ll be glad you did!

Popularity: 1% [?]